Tues-Much-Information Day

It's Tuesday, not that that matters to a blog reader. But, it matters to me. I'm starting a revolution. I want Tuesday to be Tues-Much-Information Day.

Oh, I could focus on how today features the Primaries in Illinois. But, that would be depressing. I'd rather talk about....

....my bowels.

They're kind of the same topic, if you think about it.

We've been using Poo Pourri for the past month. I declare that it works handsomely. At first, I was really skeptical. But, after test-driving both "flavors" for a month, I'm here to say that the product is mysteriously wonderful. How you spritz the toilet bowl water and then poop without leave anything blowing in the wind is beyond me. (Is it just me or does it seems wrong to put chemicals in the water so close to your tidbits?) My thinking says that the problem is not the solids, it's the gas. And, if it's the gas, then how can spritzed water make any difference?

Well, it does. I'm a fan. Not that my elimination efforts are that odifierous. (We are crossing in to the WAAAAY Tues-Much-Information now.) It's very handy for our bathroom without a vent. (Don't even start about why we have a bathroom without a vent.) And, it's delightful to use when things are a bit more....delicious.

No, I don't want to hear about how poop is not supposed to stink if you are healthy. Don't be hating on the end product, pun intended.

The successful results of my Poo Pourri test prompted me to take things to the next level. I blame it on my co-worker and his insistence that I try this product. I've seen it on Shark Tank. I've heard others talk about it. I've seen the most-hilarious ads. (You really should check the videos out). I've heard the hype. I've read the reviews. (You should read the reviews on Amazon. Worth the read.) Whatever am I babbling about?

I'm talking about the Squatty Potty.

My co-worker insists it is the greatest thing since sliced bread. His whole family uses it. (Yes, this is what we talk about at work, quite to the wife's dismay. Some people talk politics. Some people talk sports. We talk poop.) Yesterday, he was in my office and asked if I had ordered a Squatty Potty. When I said I had not, he went into action mode. He was so persuasive that I thought I might poop at my desk. I couldn't resist. I ordered one during my lunch break.

It is arriving today. Less than 24 hours from order to arrival. (America is great. What other country can get you a Squatty Potty with a 24 hour turn-around time?) I can't wait to give this thing a try. I can't wait to see the wife's face when she sees this thing. I can't wait to give you a report.

C'mon. You know you want to hear about my "results."

Much of the world is laughing that Americans buy something to help them squatty. They squatty naturally. No offense, but I'm in no mood to squatty over a hole in the ground. I'm all about our comfort level toilet with the slow-closing lid.  I'll use a product to help me squatty if I want to.

I asked my co-worker if I should use the squatty potty while sitting at the kitchen table--you know, to get things moving while doing other things like writing blogs or watching Squatty Potty videos. I figure squatty-ing at the kitchen table is no different than someone sitting on the toilet playing video games while waiting for the blessed event. But, his reaction served notice that this must be a bad idea.  He looked rather horrified. "Not if you don't want things to get messy."

Huh. He must get REALLY GOOD results from his squatting. I should be so lucky.

So, get ready. I'll be squatty-ing as soon as my Squatty Potty arrives. The wife won't be using it but I will be. I'm ready to rumble.....

Poo Pourri and a Squatty Potty. Is life good or what?