Emptying the Nest

I work hard not to write about the politics of anything presidential. (Illinois government remains fair game. Its corruption and incompetence is always blog-worthy.) Four years ago, I vowed not to use the name of "She Who Must Not be Named" when blogging about the then upcoming election. I refused to give her power.... well, except the power of laughter. I did have some good laughs. This time around, I'm struggling. How I have managed to get this far along without mentioning the GOP, I do not know. Perhaps it is become I am dumbfounded, shocked into silence.

I promise my rant will be short.

Dear Grand Old Party, 

WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU? You are imploding on an international level. The world thinks our country has lost its mind. Your party is in tatters. You'd be the laughing stock of the globe, except that this isn't funny. Those riding this great planet are flummoxed. So am I. A businessman-turned-reality-TV star with no political experience is burying you into a grave--a grave you dug. A guy who is spouting all sorts of hateful rhetoric is leading your party to "fame." It's a train wreck and you're on the train and we can't look away because who can look away from a train wreck? You owe the world an apology for letting this happen. I hope the so-far-right-we-can't-see-them-Tea-partying Christian-zealots are praying for you because you need it. God have mercy on your soul. You are no longer a grand old party. Get well Soon. Addi Warrior Princess

Shoo. I feel better already.

Eldest Niece, who has shared our abode since August, is in the process moving out. She graduated college, secured a full time job and signed a lease for an apartment near her employer. When she leaves, we will find ourselves in what is traditionally called an "empty nest." In some ways, it seems wrong to consider us "empty nesters" as we did not have children of our own and no one else has lived with us, so we didn't have a traditional nest. That said, for sixteen years, some form of living being has shared our space. Freckles joined us in 2000 and from then on, there was life beyond our own in this party palace. When Eldest Niece moves out, it will be me and the wife. No dogs, no niece. Just these lovebirds and our nest.


I cannot imagine being a parent who built a nest. Oh sure, it' part of the deal. You raise 'em, then give 'em a push out the nest so they can fly free. I tip my hat to you, parents of the world.

I wonder what it will be like to not have a dog in the nest. I really miss having a dog--the happy greeting at the door, the unconditional love, the laughs. Some days, my heart hurts with loss. Trust me--I don't miss the limitations or the costs or the worries. I don't miss getting up in the middle of a sub-zero night to take the dog out. I don't miss dead grass spots on the lawn. I like having the money I used to spend on the critters. The thing is: because the nest had a visitor, we didn't have to figure out out how to live without a dog.

The wife and I still "have" a dog or two in our nest. We worry about getting home within seven hours of leaving. We still look for a greeting at the door. Sometimes I forget I don't have to go home for lunch to let the dog out. I still look for the dog when I'm taking a quick run to the bank and I still end up in the dog treat aisle at the grocery story.

Don't hear me wrong--this is not to say I want a dog to fill that nest. I look forward to enjoying our nest without worry about a four-legged friend. It will take time and chocolate and travel to get used to the quietness of our dogless nest. I honor this process.

Perhaps the presidential election will serve as a great distraction from all this. I'll be too busy being horrified to notice anything else. Who has time to worry about an empty nest when the country's nest is on fire?

Good luck to Eldest Niece. I know she'll shine brightly in her new job, her new career. Great job, parental units of said niece. She makes your nest proud. Be with us, baby Jesus, as the wife and I face a new dawn in the nesting Addiverse.

Good luck, GOP. Sucks to be you.