.....I don't want my day being bombarded with the world's woes. I'm not saying the world woes don't exist if I'm not watching the news nor am I sticking my head in the sand via aversion of the morning news. I'm just saying I want peace, love and happiness with that first cup of coffee.
This morning is a wee bit different due to Illinois' race for the governor. I had to know who was voted the winning candidate. [Disclaimer: I don't know enough about government to speak one word more than my opinion, so please don't be insulted by the smallness of my view. I've been busy watching Doctor Who, not studying world politics.]
This is not a good way to start the day. I'm starting to think about actual things. I do not want to think about or--heaven forbid--blog about politics before breakfast. Where, oh where, is my oblivion and inner peace?
"STEP AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER!," my brain screams.
"I can't!" replies my heart. "I'm having a bout of passion."
"DON'T WRITE ABOUT POLITICAL ANYTHING!" my brain begs.
"This gay heart can't help it! Gimme more coffee and where IS that Dove Dark chocolate???" my heart murmurs.
(Ha. That's funny. A heart murmur. Oh, never mind.)
"THIS IS A MUNDANE BLOG ABOUT NOTHING REDEEMING! ONE DOES NOT TALK ABOUT POLITICS IN SUCH A BLOG!" my brain chastises.
"You obviously don't care about your marriage," my heart whispers.
"But, I do!" cries my brain. "I really, really do!"
"You talk about of both your hemispheres," laments my heart.
My brain technical wins, as I continue writing...but, my heart makes sure it stays focused in emotional passion-tainted babbling.
I'm of the school that one man can't completely uproot the political system of our great state (a good and bad thing, considering the corruptness that permeates the state's government--I leave that to political pundits). I believe that our new governor will be fine because no governor in this state has control of the state without control of the Madigan Machine. That said...I do believe that one candidate can make life a living hell for those of us who just got married.
Stand back, brain, 'cuz here comes the emotional tirade:
Dear New Governor,
Congratulations on your victory. I know you won't get to enjoy your victory until all the ballots are counted and recounted but it's looking like a win for you. I don't care that you are a Republican. I don't care that you are not a Democrat. I'm not big on those labels, just like I don't like slapping labels in other parts of my life. It's fine that you just happen to be labeled Republican. As is true with all political parties, money CAN buy you everything. I can't condone you for that.
I'm not sure why you want to be governor because that sucks almost as much as being the president. Too much stress and not enough power. Just sayin.'
Now that you'll be sitting in the big Lincoln chair come January, I want to point out--just in case you missed it while out on the candidate trail--that our marriage license says MARRIAGE LICENSE. It does not say GAY MARRIAGE LICENSE.
We are married.
We are not gay married.
We are married and can get divorced, just like you.
I hope you will look at our marriage license, because I look at it. I think it rocks.
I look at it because I can't believe it.
I NEVER thought I'd see a marriage license like this in my lifetime.
Never.
But, I hold it in my hands and I look at it and I smile.
Here--take a look at it.....
Oh, it says "Marriage License." Not "Gay Marriage License."
Huh. I like that.
I like that a lot.
I didn't mind the civil union thing. It was okay. I know you were okay with that, too. But, being married rocks a whole lot more.
So, saying that you aren't going to go "after" gay marriage and that you have gay friends (oh, goody for you!), but adding that this issue should go to referendum makes me very testy. First of all, it makes you a coward. If you don't want gay marriage in our state, then go after gay marriage. Don't pawn it off and throw your hands up in the air and blame "the people." Stand up and say what you mean and then mean what you say.
Second of all, it's not an appropriate use of a referendum. Please let someone help you understand that. I know you are new to this position but you've been around the block in the political machine a time or two. Don't you dare play dumb. I have more faith in you than that.Third, we're married. We are not gay married. As Liz Feldman says, "I parked my car. I didn't gay park it."
My brain, Mr. New Governor, assures me all will be well and that you won't push for a referendum. My brain tells me you will focus on things like the budget. My heart, however, is quite concerned about you. Please don't be a coward. Please be respectful. Please listen to Oprah.....
Everyone gets a marriage!
Goody for you that you have gay friends. What a revolutionary you are! I have straight friends. What a revolutionary I am!
I'd write more but I have to go eat my gay breakfast, take a gay shower and drive my gay car to work.
Hope you have a most gay day. Love, the Addiverse
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No politicians were hurt during the writing of this blog. Paid for by the Addiverse for Gay Car Parking.
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