Ask, Believe, Re.......uh oh!

Before I get babbling, I thought I'd show you what I look at when I am using my computer. No, that's not an EKG--that's a huge something-something on my monitor. My dear dog Lucy jumped on my lap while I was using said laptop and she unfortunately made quite the mark on the screen. It's kind of fun because some days it is much more obnoxious than others. This photo was taken on a "not so obnoxious" day. Today, the worm-EKG-monitor damage is much wider but shorter. The shape changes whenever I move the laptop. This is a problem as one would hope a laptop would remain portable. I try not to move it unless absolutely necessary.

I can't complain too much, tho. I am a happy camper just to have a laptop. As fixing it would cost way more than getting a new laptop, I shall persevere and ignore the "monitor worm" as best possible.

I have included this photo of Lucy, Bark of Poteidaia, so you can see who the culprit is. Notice she has her eyes closed. She learned that from her sister. I believe she is pretending not to know anything about my computer screen.


And, now--back to our regularly scheduled programming.

Be careful for what you ask. You might just get it.

The wife has been putting out the thought for a Ford Taurus. I have no idea why, but she finds the new model sporty and what-not. (Thankfully, she favors the two door. Although my age does suggest I should be a four-door kind of girl, I am not.) She has researched the car, priced the car, gone and looked at the car, gotten advertisements about the car. As she really didn't see the car payment in her future (after all, SOMEONE has to take care of my needs), she hasn't gone out and purchased a Taurus. The wife worked hard at making sure the Universe was aware of her interest in getting a Taurus...

Yesterday, the wife gets a call from her parental units. Crying and mayhem ensued. I was sure someone was dead, but the quickly realized that the wife and her family cry about everything. EVERYTHING. Good, bad, happy, scary, touching, confusing....weddings, baptisms, communions, first job, touching TV commercial, Packer touchdown, Packer victory....they are always crying about something. Turns out that her brother (aka Tommy Hilfiger) purchased a new car--a Ford something--for the mama. (He is always buying cars and giving them away. What is he--the Car Oprah? Ford must love him....he only gives away Fords, as far as I remember.)

So, that is all fine and dandy....until the wife finds out she is about to get what she's be asking for....kind of....

You know how I said be careful for what you ask? It pays to be really specific when you ask.

The wife asked for a Taurus....she just forgot to mention she'd like a brand new Taurus. She got a Taurus....her parents' 2001 Taurus.

I'm still laughing about that. The Universe does indeed have a good sense of humor.

We are very excited about the "new" car as the Mold Mobile has been driving the wife bonkers for the past year. (BTW, she just put a new starter in it yesterday--only moments before learning she was about to get her Taurus). The plan was to drive the Mold Mobile until it was impossible to go on doing so and until the wife got her Taurus. Lest any of you think it would be awesome to sell the Mold Mobile and make some money while still getting a car, let me remind you again: the car leaks when it rains. I mean pours. Go around a corner--water pours out from some unknown place in the roof and gushes down your head. (Never a good thing when driving.) It really does have mold growing in it. The windows don't work. The sun roof is rusted shut. The seats are water logged. The cruise control is possessed. The lights don't point at the road--they point up at the trees. (Well, at least one of them does. The other one points towards neighborhood picture windows). Who knows what might be mechanically wrong with it.

Although I truly do love that car, even I know it's time for it to go.

I dropped the wife off in the Cheddarlands late this afternoon so she could pick up the new used car. I immediately turned around, stopped and got my favorite sandwich at that favorite bread place, zipped on home, walked in to see the photos I ordered had come in the mail.......

.....imagine my surprise when I see there are over 300 photos in six different mailers. Um, I only ordered maybe---MAYBE--75 or 100 photos. Instead, I had copies of copies of copies. I was very confused by this until I realized what had happened. I had been fighting with the computer last Sunday, trying to order all those stupid photos via "Snapping Fish." I got the stuff uploaded, placed my specific order and....Error! I get an error message, never seeing that anything could have possibly been ordered. I do this again. Get through the whole thing, go to submit order... Error message! I get frustrated after the third time and go to bed. The next morning, I order the photos without incident.

Yeah, well all those times I got the error message, the order went through.

Being the peri-menopausal bitch that I am, I got right on line and got ready to give Snapping Fish a piece or two of my mind. (What the hell am I supposed to do with like six identical photos of the neighbor's dog? I like the dog just fine, but really.) I got a "live chat" going and before I knew it, I was promised a refund for the first batch of orders. I'm not sure how many orders were truly placed, so I'm not really sure what kind of refund I am--or am not--getting. Time will tell.

Finally, an update on Larry. We (Larry and me) have an appointment with the surgeon next week--of which I am very excited (in a good way). I went to my doctor and asked for the referral as well as some blood work. Might as well get my money's worth from my insurance. As anticipated, my blood work came back perfect. I knew it would. I was much more dismayed that my doctor of 25 or so years didn't remember why I was there or how I had just seen him the previous week than about any benign lump. Hello!

I then went to visit the beloved "I love you for taking such good care of the wife" gynecologist. I told him I have a lump under my armpit--after all, he was about to start fondling my parts, might as well tell him. After giving me a stern lecture on the potential errors in mammogram images and after talking about breast cancer as related to such lumps, he felt the lump....and said, "Oh, that's a lymph node, that's not breast material."

WHEN WILL THESE PEOPLE START LISTENING TO ME THE FIRST TIME??!!!!

The exam went swimmingly, like I knew it would. I continue to feel very confident about Larry. As I've said before and will say again, if I weren't worried about losing my insurance, Larry and I would keep our current relationship. But, sometimes relationships must end and thus Larry and I are going to see the surgeon. I figure he'll be gone by then, cuz that's the kind of guy he is.

Until the appointment, I'll be in the kitchen, sorting photos. I'm sure Larry will enjoy that. Heck, I'll probably still be sorting photos before, during and after the appointment.

.......If anyone needs photos of Brown Dog, Freckles with her eyes closed or of the wife's godson's first communion, give me a holler. But, be careful for what you ask....you might just get it.