Garden a-go go

Spring has sprung in the Addiverse. Here's just a small "taste" of what's in bloom around the yard. The trees in the back yard have gone crazy--the flowering crabs, flowering cherries and kwanzan cherry trees are in full allergen production. My eyes water just looking at all those tree pollens. I threw in a photo of some bleeding hearts just because I like them.

Be warned, you evil Japanese Beetles! We spent some time today pouring poison into the ground (so much for Earth Day and drinking moldy coffee in recycled Styrofoam cups)--I am determined not to face the wrath of Japanese Beetles again this year and thus poured the very expensive fertilome drench around our trees. I have much hope that those critters will be in fewer droves this summer. We've spent a boatload of money and spilled vats of chemicals to ensure a smaller infestation. Time will tell. I.hate.those.things. They make me crazy.

We've only had one gardening mishap this spring and that was the "freezing of the Marigolds." You can see they don't look so good. I affirm they will be just fine. Why, you might ask, did I buy marigolds so early in the season? (Or, why did I buy them at all, you ask if you are the wife. She is not a fan of marigolds, not that she has a marigold phobia or bias. She did not grow up with marigolds and thus does not have the same affinity I have for these little gems.) Well, me and the gaybor planted a garden and I heard that marigolds keep the bunnies away.....and, we want to do everything to keep the bunnies away from our new garden!

Yes, you read that right: I am in the midst of my first vegetable garden. Garden Grrrrl (who is Bitty Bichon's mom and used to be called Chisky Grrrrl and then was called Queen of Connections and who from this moment forward be called Garden Grrrrl) and I got ourselves all a-titter with the idea of growing our own veggies. (Does this make us a co-op?) Neither of us has ever grown a garden, so I'm sure we are fodder for the wife and the neighbors. We just woke up one day (in our separate beds, in our own houses, sillies) and both thought it would be an awesome idea to have a garden. We have dreams of grandeur. We picture mouth-watering, fresh, delicious veggies on our plates by the end of the summer.

Did I mention neither of us has ever planted a "real" garden before? Oh sure, I've grown plants. I know how to weed the wife's gardens. I even designed my own "mailbox garden" last summer. But, a real veggie garden? Not so much. I've used an avocado pit to "grow" a plant (come on, admit it--you've taken an avocado pit, put some tooth picks in it and stuck it in a half glass of water), but that's not growing a garden.

So, this is our garden. If you look closely you can see the little wire fence surrounding the beautifully-tilled soil (hopefully you can see it better than Bitty Bichon, who did not see it and ran nose first right into it). You can also see the fake bunny (the wife's garden statue, stolen from another area in her floral gardens).....Fake bunny is strategically placed to (1) scare away real bunnies; and, (2) fill the hole where the fence ends. I'm not sure it will fulfill either of those duties but it's worth a shot. This photo was taken before the planting of the marigolds, so you'll have to wait for the garden update photo to enjoy those little plants of gold. It's not a very big garden--we may be ignorant but we're not stupid. Start small, work our way up.

The garden is technically on three different properties---ours, gaybors' and on the unknown neighbor (who we've only seen on a rare occasion, usually wearing a neck brace, a winter parka and a big woolen hat). That's her wooden fence in the background. We figure she never comes out of the yard, so she'll never know what the hell we're doing on her property. If she gives us trouble, will send Bitty Bichon after her.

I will tell you that ripping out all of that grass was a lot harder than I thought it would be. I had dirt in my sinus cavities for a week after surviving that ordeal. It's quite disturbing to blow your nose and have dirt come out.

We had a moment of excitement when I hit a buried cable while digging. Don't tell JULIE! I had, at one moment before digging, asked aloud if I should call before digging but then thought otherwise; after all, I had JULIE out last year and thought I remembered where all the wires in the yard are placed. Um, guess I forgot about the cable wire. Thankfully, I just nicked the piss out of it--I didn't sever it and the cable still worked and I wasn't electrocuted, so I guess all is well in the gardening world. (Next year, when we expand our garden, I will call and have JULIE come mark everything. I promise. You read it here.)

Because we are garden virgins, we really don't know what we should actually try to grow. I thought zucchini, only because I've heard they are really easy to grow. We settled on things like onions, peppers of various sorts, herbs of this or that, greens, tomatoes, etc. It's early, so we may get crazed and grow something really fun. Asparagus, anyone?

Because we are still teetering on the frosty time of year, we really can't plant much just quite yet. We know you serious gardeners have already planted your gardens and protect them as needed on those colder nights, but Garden Grrrrl and I don't have time for such nonsense. We are going to employ patience and wait to plant things (which is absolutely painful to me--I want to plant NOW!). Thankfully, Garden Grrrl put some onions in last week and I got to carefully place the marigolds today....so, I am feeling patient for the moment. I'll focus on weeding everything in site until it's time to plant some veggies.....

.....While I was out there planting the marigolds today, I saw the most wonderful thing--a small green sprig of an onion was oh-so-slightly peeking out of the soil. That's almost as exciting as getting my Lady Gaga ticket in the mail. I can almost taste our fresh summer salads!

You do know that if our garden is a disaster, I will go to a farmer's market, buy some veggies and literally throw them into our garden so I can at least pretend we grew something......