Bear Down, Chicago Bears!

Be warned, men: there is WAY too much information included in this blog. You squeamish guys who don't want to hear about certain womanly issues should turn away now, no matter how much you love the Bears.

Well, the Bears may have lost to Green Bay last Sunday but it didn't stop me from having a great time at Soldier Field. The wife was in her glory with a Packer win, but I'm not sure she had as much fun as I did--worrying about your team takes its toll. That's the beauty about cheering for the Bears--they suck, so you don't really expect them to win. You just bitch about them losing and call it a day.

In preparation for my first trip to Soldier Field, we went on a shopping spree only a hunter or a outdoor sportsman could love. I found an awesome pair of winter boots at Gander-at-that-Mountain, home of the snow-boot-for-25-degrees-below-zero-weather; although they cost more than I wanted to spend, I knew they would keep my tootsies toasty and was glad that they were not camouflage. I also bought some new socks, some of those hand-warmer thingies and a new orange and blue hat. Yummy!

My second line of defense would be layers--lots of them. I had it all planned out--base layer of long-underwear; second layer of "normal" clothes (jeans and sweater); outer layer of snow pants and Bears jacket. I knew it was "scarf" day at the game, so I'd also don my new, free, orange & blue scarf. This all sounded good in theory and I was quite impressed with my planning, until......

......I woke up with a surprise. Yes, ladies---under all those layers, I would be dealing with a monthly womanly delight. Now, THERE'S some fun at a football game where you are dressed like the kid in "A Christmas Story." The thought of having to take off all those layers to go to a public bathroom made me break out in a cold sweat. So much for my planned limitation of liquid intake--it wouldn't matter, as I'd have to go to the bathroom while at the game. Might as well drink up that hot chocolate in the $6.50 commemorative cup.

Men, you cannot appreciate this. Women, feel my pain!

Armed with warm clothes, money, parking pass, tickets and tampons, we hopped in the car nice and early, as suggested by our ticket-giving neighbors. The goal, they explained to us, was to beat the traffic jam. As they are seasoned Bears-game-goers, we took their advice and got to the parking lot by 9:30 AM. (I hear many a fan has missed the beginning of the game due to being stuck in traffic.) We did indeed miss the traffic and we scored a great parking space. Unbelievably to us, the lot was filled with tail-gating football fans at this early hour. Beer flowing, bags flying, grills grilling--it was an explosion of blue and orange. Even more unbelievably, there was a ton of green and gold milling about in the Parking lot--in fact, I'd guess a fourth of the people in the lot (and, at the game) were Packer fans. And, here I was afraid the wife would be in danger due to her decision to wear her packer coat--instead, she was safely surrounded by her peeps.

Once we left the car, we were exposed to the elements. Unlike Lambeau Field, Soldier Field does not have any "indoor" areas offering shelter from the cold. Thankfully, it wasn't nearly as cold as I thought it would be--the temp hovered around 35 degrees--which is quite balmy for Chicago in December. Those new boots and all those layers kept me warm and dry.

We wandered around the tail-gate area and enjoyed the sites before entering the hallowed halls of Soldier Field. (If you click on the photo collage above, you can get a closer look at the photos.) We saw a little of everything. Everyone seemed festive and jolly, even though Chicago fans are basically bitter and angry people. Before the game, they are happy and smiling--during and after the game, it's a hate fest. The wife still can't get over that part of the event.

I'm not sure why they (whoever they are) decided to "upgrade" and make Soldier Field look like a giant space ship, but they did and it is indeed quite the site, from inside and out. It was still awe-inspiring to be at Soldier Field, home of Walter Payton, Dick Butkus, Gayle Sayers and the fifty some quarterbacks that have played for the Bears in the last ten minutes...

After snarfing down a pizza (God, I love Chicago for its pizza) and after finding the wife a hot dog (which basically sucked, per her report-- it wasn't a true Chicago hot dog and so she was very disappointed but ate it anyways--she said she had paid too much to throw it away), we found our way to our seats. We were able to see everything from our perch--it was awesome. Man, we love our neighbors!

The wife was lucky enough to be seated next to a Bears fan who just happened to have four Packer players on his fantasy football team; hence, he found himself cheering for both teams. (Fantasy football sure makes football-watching that much more interesting, if you ask me. The wife feels otherwise.)

While the pre-game antics were in full gear, I kept putting out the thought that there would be an Air Force fly-by at the end of the Star Spangled Banner. I mean, come on: is there any better way to start a football game than with the roar of fighter jets? We stood, sang, put our hats back on....damn, no fly by. Just as I was about to sit down for the start of the game, I heard them---the jets were coming! Better a few seconds late than never. They swooped in from the south, gave the crowd a thrill and roared off to the north, finishing their fly-by with a criss-cross move. NOW the game could begin!

I must admit, the most entertaining part of the game was when a very drunk man (sitting two people to my right) managed to fall over into the row in front of him, falling directly on some small woman--who promptly let out a blood-curdling scream.....the guy ended up with his feet literally in the air, his head on the cement between the rows. He kept yelling, "I'm all right!" while his feet flayed in the air. He was not able to get up on his own--he required help from several fans to right himself. Thankfully, the smooshed woman was no worse for the wear. Once it was determined she was fine, the ribbing began. That man didn't hear the end of it for the remainder of the game, deservedly so.

As for the rest of the crowd, there was a lot of yelling, moaning, bitching, whining, spewing, threatening. Chicago fans are serious about their sports and they do not take kindly to losing teams, losing coaches, losing seasons. The wife was quite enthralled--she'd never experienced anything like it. If I were Lovie, I'd need therapy. Everyone wants him fired or worse. Like I said, Chicago fans are brutal. (It was rumored there were so many Packer fans at this game because the season ticket holders were boycotting and thus sold their tickets.)

Anyone who knows me knows that we didn't stay for the end of the game. I'm so predictable. We left so I could get out of the lot without incident and so I could get to a bathroom sooner than later. Hey, I drive a stick shift car and I had my period--no need to make things more stressful than they might be. Have you ever been in stop-and-go Chicago traffic in an automatic? We zipped out of there and were back on the expressway before the wife could even get the game tuned in on the A.M. dial.....

....we listened as the Bears lost....again (or, the Packers won, depending on your point of view). Oh well--in the words of Cubs fans, "there's always next year."

I can't wait to use my commemorative cup.....maybe when the wife's family visits.....
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