Climb Every Woman

What do you mean, it's already Thursday night? Geez, the week just blew by.

I thought you blog readers would like to see what the luscious Maytag Neptune has been up to. Yum, that's a tasty hole chewed right through yet another household item. I guess the good news is that the washer is working...if it weren't working, it wouldn't be able to mangle any of our belongings.

I'm finally blogging about the song lyrics you beloved readers have "sent" in. I thank Chick-a-hello for getting me back on track with this, as she is the one who admits that she sang, "Climb Every Woman, It's all I need" as the lyrics to "I'm Every Woman," as sung by Whitney.

Actually, I'm thinking Chick-a-hello got it right--no offense to Whitney.

I received lots of little lyric tidbits from friends, relatives, my own mind. My Wild Mama emailed to say her sister used to laugh at her when she'd sing the Christmas Carol "deck the halls with bowels of holly," at the top of her lungs. Some lyrics are a bit more perverse than others ("oh oh oh it's magic you know--she thought it was--oh oh oh itch my dick you know"--I'll spare the person who sent that to me). There were simple errors, such as "would you like a ride in my beautiful room" or "somewhere over the rainbow, weigh a pie" or "I can see clearly now, I can see icicles in my way."

But, the best emails I received.....

I'm very honored to utilize an actual story from the halls of Culver Gryffendoor. I take no credit for her wit & humor. Thank you, Culver, for the great laugh!

"Ok, here's a great story about song lyrics... my best friend in high school was (Eye-oh-Wah Cow Grrrl). Her dad was the Veterinarian in town. Now, I grew up in a small farming community (what other kind is there in Iowa?) , so being a vet meant lots of cows, pigs, sheep, horses along with dogs and cats thrown in here and there. One of the things a vet gets the privilege of doing is "preg-checking" livestock. Mostly cows. Yes, that means checking the cows to see if they were with child or calf I guess. To do this the Vet would roll up his sleeves, soap up his arms and insert said arm up past the elbow into the cow's vagina to see if there was a baby calf in her uterus. Ultra sounds aren't done on farm animals. You get the picture. I personally witnessed this act many times. It was important to know so 1) you would stop sicking the bull on her and let him be more productive elsewhere 2) you would make sure the cow had all her shots, good nutrition, out of the muck etc.

"Ok...so about that time ABBA had the hit song "Take a Chance on Me." Not sure the year, I don't pay attention to that type of detail. Growing up in small town Iowa all we had was A.M. radio with farm reports and music in between the reports. If the song was a hit sometime within the last year, we got to hear it over and over and over again (I used to think the Osmond Brothers were actually at the radio station singing every time their song was on, but that's another story). So we heard a lot of "Take a Chance on Me." My friend and her two younger brothers (being of Swedish decent) that it was a really catchy tune and sang it A LOT. Especially the part where the background was "take a chance, take a chance, take a chance-chance. (Are you singing along?).....only they thought the lyrics were.....

"check a cow, check a cow, check a cow-cow." No lie, God's truth!!!!

To this day that's how I sing along to ABBA. I have not seen Mama Mia and think it would spoil the whole thing for me since I'm guessing there are no cows on the stage."

Nothing I can say--or sing or write--can top that......so, I leave it here. Mooooo.
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