You are Here

Okay, so you are not here. I'm not here, either. But, I WILL be here soon enough!

******

The wife and I have spent the last three nights fighting--er, I mean discussing vacation ideas. We had long given up on a vacation as it is not in my budget...and, besides--Master Reiki and Blue Eyes had just taken us to Hawaii, Wisconsin. Still, the "V" word kept popping up and thus we have been staring at the computer screen for three solid nights, looking for a vacation to be had.

******

My demands were many. It had to be during a specific week in May. It had to be warm and sunny and safe. It had to be within so many dollars. It had to be a non-stop flight. It had to be somewhere NOT on the western side of Mexico (I'm still shivering from how cold the water was in Cabo). It had to have many things to do--like snorkeling, hiking, touristy things like culture, museums, shopping, etc. It had to be all-inclusive. I preferred it be an island but would be okay with being on land as long as it was near water. It could be in the US, it could be in the Carribean, it could be in Mexico. I didn't want to go to Europe. Hawaii was too expensive. It had to be a minimum of four out of five stars/apples/suns.

**********

As you can imagine, my demands made the search both easier and more difficult.

**********

We took turns surfing the web, each of us looking as long as we could stand it--then, we'd pass the laptop to the other. (The Blue-screen-of-death-free computer, I might add. Still no problems from the BSOD. Take that, computer store!) The wife seemed to be searching sites with fruit (think: apple) and I seemed to be searching ala carte--flight, hotel, etc separate to make our own package. We looked at every single web site known to man about travel. We plugged in dates and times and airports and destinations. The wife was thinking seven days; I was thinking five; the web sites were thinking three. By the 349th time I had searched a certain airline's flight availability, I cracked. I couldn't stand doing this any more. By night three, I never wanted to go on another vacation. The wife kept talking about Puerta Villarta and I kept thinking, "the water is gonna be waaaaay too cold there." We fought about money, about travel dates, about locations, about ideas, about flight itineraries.

**********

It was too much. Last night, I threw in the towel and went to bed, vacation-plan-less.

**********

When I got to work this morning (for some reason, it was only 5:59 AM when I got there, so I had time to consider my options), I came to the conclusion that the Internet was not the way to seek fun in the sun. I knew it was time for a professional intervention....

**********

....it was time to find a travel agent.

**********

The wife was in agreement, so I made my list of demands and set off to the land of travel brochures and posters. (I asked the wife not to come as I figured we'd just sit there and bicker while some poor travel agent waited for us to shut up.) I finished my day at work and took my laundry list to an unsuspecting travel agent. I admitted my defeat and admitted I never wanted to search for a vacation on line again in my entire life.

**********

To her credit, she didn't laugh or chastise me--she smiled in knowing, empathetic manner.

**********

Travel Queen listened patiently to my list of demands. "I want to be on a beach, in the sun, enjoying really warm water. I've already been here, here, here, and here and I want somewhere else." Blah, blah, blah. I went on and on, squishing three nights of searching into a five minute speech. She stopped taking notes and instead just listened, nodding in agreement every once in awhile. She asked few questions: "Passport?" (Yes, we have them.) "Out of the country?" (Yes, but not Europe. I'm not in the mood for Europe. I indicated Mexico would be all right.) I kept describing my needs and wants, she kept listening. I could tell her wheels were turning. I liked this woman.

**********

When I added, "We loved Cozumel; we absolutely loved it," she got a very bright look on her face, got up from her chair, grabbed a bright orange travel guide, opened it up, put it in front of my face and pointed to a beautiful, glossy picture. "Here."

*********

I took a gander. It was beautiful.

*********

Travel Queen explained this place in the photo was all inclusive. The flights were on the dates I requested. The length of the stay was five nights. It came complete with warm water, beautiful beaches, lots of sunshine. It was most definitely not on the west coast of Mexico. It had five fruits/stars/suns. It was in my price range. Every room was a suite with jacuzzi. It was near site seeing of my interest. I didn't know where it was, but it looked great.

**********

I was stunned. What took us three nights of pain took her less than ten minutes. She digested everything I told her and spit out the perfect trip in minutes. (I bow at her feet. I will never again think of travel agents as archaic.)

**********

I called the wife and asked, "Do you trust me?" Thankfully, she said yes. I told her I would be booking our trip and then hung up. I offered her no time to ask questions. I looked at the lady (who had a raised eyebrow and small smile on her face) and handed her my credit card......

**********

......Ca-ching! Riviera Maya, here we come!

Mexico. Authentic Mexican food. We love authentic Mexican food. I knew the wife would be very pleased and excited. (We like to live on the edge--we eat the authentic food as well as that offered in the resort.) Beyond food, we'd have Ruins and eco-touring, Snorkeling and Warm Weather. It was like the lady read my mind, read the wife's mind, took in my list of demands and poofed out an answer.

**********

All in ten minutes!

**********

Glossy travel brochure in hand, I returned home to show the wife what we had just booked. I knew she'd love it, as it met all her criteria, too. (She's all about the amenities.) As neither of us had done any real research on this actual spot, we knew we'd have to....

**********

...go back to the Internet and search some more. Ugh! (I am so leaving this up to the wife.)

**********

At least this time we won't have to stare at the monitor without direction. We have a destination to look at, to learn about, to celebrate.

**********

I'd write more but the wife and I have to start getting into "bikini-wearing shape." We've only got a very short few weeks.....and, our bikinis are not cooperating in this arena.....

**********

....do you think they'd let me bring my pot holders to Mexico???

*******************************************