Tie me down and Tie me Rod

So, there I am, driving up and down the road, asking the wife repeatedly, "do you hear that?" and, "do you feel that?" I know that there is something seriously wrong with my car and I know it's something near the front end but I don't know enough about cars to know what is wrong and it's not like a tire is falling off or anything, so I am left to wonder aloud what is exactly wrong. I turn the wheel and ask the wife, "do you hear that squeaking?" I turn off the radio and make her ride along with me. I mutter that it's probably a strut or something, as I know struts are in the front end and that maybe that's what the noise is all about. Still, I am at the mercy of the mechanic.

As it was time for an oil change anyway, the wife offers to take the car in. We make the executive decision to take it to the Mazda dealer. This is a "six of one, half dozen of another" kind of situation. You pay out the ass when you go to the dealer, but the dealer has parts in stock and should actually know how to fix the problems associated with the specific make and model. We've had super luck with this dealer and so it does not seem like a time to veer from our standard procedure of dealer-for-oil-changes. I kiss the wife good bye and tell her to call me only if the repairs are going to be $200.00 or more.

Imagine my excitement when my phone rings at 8 AM.

I know this is NOT a good sign. I inquire about the issue and the wife indeed indicates it is not a good thing. Something about tie rods and steering and...blah blah blah...it all sounds the same to me. I ask, "so, are we talking about $600?" (Why I picked $600, I have no idea. It's just the number that came out of my mouth spontaneously.) She says, "it's worse."

It is NOT a good thing!

I now begin to realize that this is the Universe's way of punishing me for buying that damn Xena Convention Ticket while ignoring my dedication to the Dave Ramsey Debt Diet. Or, maybe it's the Universe telling me, "Moron, you are SO not going to be out of debt by January 1, 2008." Or, maybe cars just suck.

I am in no mood to shop around for parts or prices. "Tall Rick," a friend from way back, is the service manager and I'm pretty sure he wouldn't screw us more than necessary to make his paycheck. The wife tells me that we are talking about $1000. Ugh.

I give her the go-ahead. After all, I can't exactly drive without functioning tie rods and ball joints and what not. I don't want to end up looking like this poor jeep (photo to right, "gleaned" from rps4wd.com). I feel like I should just bend over and get it over with. I'm gonna get screwed and I know it.

While the wife is fretting at the dealer, I get on line and check out what the hell a tie rod is. I love "Car Talk" and go to their site in an effort to get some answers. They catch my attention when writing "....If [the tie rods] are bad, you should replace them right away, because if they break, your heirs could be reading this explanation."

That's all I needed to read. Bring on the damned tie rods!

Tierodexperts.com (can you even believe there is a site about tie rod experts???) indicates:
"A tie rod makes the wheels of your vehicle turn by sending the force made by the rack gear to the steering knuckle. The length of the tie rod can be altered for alignment purposes by an adjusting sleeve that's connected to the outer tie rod. Just like all other components on you automobile, the tie rod can wear down or loosen. Key signs that your tie rod needs to be replaced are drifting tires, irregular steering, and unwarranted tire erosion. It's important that you get your vehicle a wheel alignment after replacing your old tie rods because installing new tie rods upsets the toe setting."

Whatever! Just fix it and get it over with!

From the looks of things on the Internet (the all-knowing internet, that is), tie rods are pretty cheap. Unfortunately, at the dealer, this is not the case. Add some parts, add some wheel alignment and add a shit-load of labor and you're looking at $1000.00.

I hear Dave Ramsey screaming in the background.

All this nonsense of spending of money leads me back to my rambling of how I like to get a new car every few years and thus I never get to this point--I never end up putting the big bucks into car repair because I just get a new car. I'm not used to this car problem stuff and I certainly don't like it. My car has been paid off for a few months...and, guess what? The money I would have paid in car payments for the past three months would have totaled exactly what I will now be paying for repairs! ARRRG!

I suppose the good news is that the car is fixed, no one was killed while riding in my car, nothing fell off the car, it was less than $2000, the parts were in stock, it was fixed in less than a day, there was plenty of room on the credit card, our total airline miles will go up because of this cost and "Tall Rick" thinks my car is in excellent shape. The bad news is (besides the cost) that I need more work on some squeaky thing in the front and that will be about $250.00.

Screw that--I can live with squeaking for awhile....or, maybe I can take it in to get it fixed and buy a new car instead while I'm at the dealer.......

....I didn't just say that, did I???