Spewing Rainbows and Unicorns

Finally! Finally something fun to blog about!

Well, fun for me. I have no idea if it will be fun for you to read. Here's hoping.

I am a shoe whore. Maybe a shoe slut. I love shoes. Love, love, love. I have a shoe collection of which to be proud. Now, I'm not talking Imelda Marcos (insert sad emoji here if you don't know who that is) collection. I'm talking casual footwear of which I actually wear.

Some people collect shoes and don't wear them. Um, what? What is the point of having shoes if you don't wear them? They are to be worn, celebrated, loved.

I am not a shoe snob. I like the "brands of the people." Usual gym shoes. (Do they still call them gym shoes? They will always be gym shoes to me. Sneakers? Tennis shoes?) I have other shoes but gym shoes are my go-to footwear. Casual and comfortable. My shoes must be comfortable. I don't understand why people wear shoes that hurt. People, love your feet!

I've owned my share of brands across the spectrum. But, the shoes that dominate my collection are Converse.

I might have to amend my statement about shoes having to be comfortable. Many people do not find the lack of support in Converse to be comfortable in any capacity. The are fine by me. I would not go on a 10-mile hike or choose to wear them all day dragging myself around an adventure park but they are perfect for daily footwear. Work, outings and dancing are easily accommodated in my Converse.

I've always wanted to design my own pair of Chucks. In fact, I've designed many a pair... I just never ordered them. I'd always design them, admire them and... not order them.

Until now.

I decided that this year for my birthday I needed to design my own pair of Converse. Bonus points for the design being inspired by Pride Month. Damn email from Converse arrived just at the perfect time--it was a sign from the Baby Jesus and the marketing department that it was time to design some shoes.

Designing shoes on-line is really easy. You click on things, take a gander, decide yes or no and keep on moving. I'm ridiculously decisive when it come to things like this, so it works for me. If you are indecisive or need to let things marinate, forget it. You'll be designing shoes for days. After all, EVERY detail is yours to decide. Color of eyelets? Check. Color of stitching? Check. Color of striping? Check. Don't like how that looks? Trade it out for something else. Color of the back tag? Check. On and on it goes until you've designed your personal work of foot art.

And, thus my shoes were born. 

I went with the "these are SUPER gay" theme, with bonus points for spewing rainbows and unicorns on the tongue. I could have made the entire shoe rainbows and unicorns but that seemed a bit much for even me. I stayed with my "I'm a tacky kind of gal" thinking, true to my inner being. I was giddy with delight when taking in the view of my newly-designed shoes.

The shoes took a while to get here. After all, the were literally on a slow boat from China. I didn't realize the shoes were made across the sea--that might have been a deal-breaker had I known. Alas, it wasn't until the tracking information popped up in my email that I saw some ten year old was probably making 12 cents an hour across the sea so my feet would look good. Sigh.

It was glorious when the shoes arrived. GLORIOUS! Even the box was glorious. Who doesn't like to see "Converse by You" as part of the deal. I designed these diddies!

They did not disappoint.  These are my favorite pair of shoes of all time. OF.ALL.TIME! 

Thank you, little 10 year old for making my dream come true.

Yes, the spew of rainbows and unicorns was perfect, just as I imagined. Yes, the decision to have a white toe was correct. Yes, the rainbow tag on the tongue was just the right touch. The fit was true to size. Glorious!

I've worn my shoes every day since their arrival and I plan on wearing them every day until the end of the month. They will remain a heavy favorite in the shoe rotation. Although I sprayed them to keep them from certain doom, I will still choose wisely about wearing them in inclement weather. I will cherish these shoes for the rest of my life. Even after they are retired from rotation, beaten but not broken, I will keep them. The wife will just have to accept this.

In a world of strife and hate and uncertainty and stress and illness, the little things can make a profound difference. In my case, a pair of shoes can silence the world, albeit for only a short duration.

Pandemic? Look at these awesome shoes--they match my mask!
Riots? Look at my gay shoes, ready for Pride month!
Hate? My shoes embrace all colors of God's rainbow!
Politics? I can't hear you over the sound of my awesome shoes! Did you say something?
Global Warming? It's a dry heat. Don't worry.

What could be better than personally-designed Converse spewing rainbows and unicorns? World peace, maybe. Brotherly love? That'd be sweet. People actually believing scientists? Big bonus points.

But, I'm telling ya.... these are a mighty tough, glorious act to follow.

Color me shallow. As long as you color my shoes like rainbows on speed, I'm good with it. Did I mention my shoes are GLORIOUS?

Happy Pride.
Peace in our hearts.
Peace on the streets.
Love to all.
Shoes for me.

Glorious.
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