Positively Oppositivity

It is no secret that the wife and I are basically as opposite as you can get. I am an ENFP; she's an ISTJ. I love sci-fi; she loves reality. I like potty humor; she isn't entertained. I don't even know why anyone employs a spice rack; she likes the spices lined up alphabetically. I'm a vegetarian; she's a staunch carnivore. I want to swim in ice cream; she wants to be enveloped in warm bread. I want to drive (enjoy the scenery); she wants to fly (get there fast). I think the perfect going-out-for-dinner "date" is sharing dinner with several other couples; she think the perfect dinner date is just the two of us. For me, watching football is purely for entertainment;  for her, it's a way of life, which means she talks in "we" when speaking about the team.

The only thing we fully have in common is a love of Mexican food. Oh, how we both love authentic Mexican food. Thank god for Mexican food.

So, it is no surprise that we take different actions and approaches when it comes to real life. She worries about things I never even think about. I do things that she has no idea of why I might even consider. It's usually rather humorous. Well, at least to me. She is not usually entertained.

Case in point... I can't remember if I've ever blogged about the engine mount issues I faced a year or two ago. To recap, my engine mount problem, in which the engine mount was "bent" but not dangerous, meant that my car was REALLY loud, especially when idling. I didn't care about it; the wife did. After many months of her obsessing about it, I took the car to my mechanic. It went something like this:

Doc Car: Your engine mount is bent.
Me: Is that dangerous?
Doc Car: No.
Me: Is my engine going to fall out?
Doc Car: No.
Me: Is it going to get worse?
Doc Car: Probably not.
Me: If it were your car, would you fix it?
Doc Car: (shrugs shoulders) Depends on if the noise bothers you.
Me: Does it bother you?
Doc Car: (shrugs shoulders again) No. Does it bother you?
Me: No.

You know the result. I did not get the engine mount fixed.  It had nothing to do with money. I couldn't care less about the money to get if fixed. The noise and vibration didn't bother me one bit. Why fix something that isn't bothering me and that isn't dangerous?

I'll tell you why I got it fixed. Because the wife drove me bonkers about it. (Well, that and because my sister-in-law was mortified by the sound and vibration while I was driving her somewhere. I guess I didn't realize how obnoxious it really was.) My decision not to get the mount fixed came close to infuriating the wife. That noise and vibration consumed the wife. It's all she could talk about when riding in my car. That opposite way of being made for many a comment from both of us.

The wife: (Scowl on face) I can't believe you didn't get it fixed.
Me: It's not dangerous. It's not like my engine is going to fall out.
The wife: I can't stand it. Why wouldn't you get it fixed?
Me: Because it doesn't bother me.
The wife: It bothers ME.
Me: So I gather.

I finally acquiesced and got it fixed. For the record, it was worth every penny spent because it got the wife to stop talking about it.


Flash forward to yesterday. I took my car back to the mechanic for a different noise. My car gives an initial "scream" when it's started the first time every day. It only does it when it's 50 degrees or colder outside. It only does it once. The car starts just fine. It runs smoothly. Besides the initial noise, there is no other noise. It makes me laugh.

Imagine a baby pterodactyl getting pinched in the butt when sleeping, so it is startled and wakes up in a panic. That's kind of how the noise sounds. As you can imagine, this noise REALLY bothers the wife. She doesn't like the baby pterodactyl. Me? I figure the car starts just fine, runs just fine, is just fine. This has been going on for about nine months. Since the weather has been warmer than usual, the screaming hasn't been that bad....

....unless you are the wife. Then, the screaming is blood curdling and a sign of certain doom. The engine is going to blow up. The house is going to blow up when the engine blows up. Her Mustang is going to blow up because my Honda blew up.

Now, I'm not saying a screaming engine is a good thing. I'm100% sure it's not a good thing nor is it normal. The majority of you would not like having a scream to start your engine. I honor that.

I finally did a web search and figured that this screaming thing might be more problematic than I considered. After nine months, I gave in and called the mechanic. I dropped off the car and left it overnight so the mechanic could enjoy the full effect of a cold engine scream. While I was standing with a co-worker, I got a call fro Doc Car. Humorously enough to me, the conversation with the mechanic about the scream resembled the conversation about the engine mount:

Me: Did you hear the scream?
Doc Car:  Yeah. It actually did it a couple times for me.
Me: (laughs) What do you think it is?
Doc Car: I'm not sure. It's probably the starter.
Me: Do I need a new starter?
Doc Car: Up to you. It's pretty expensive. At least $500. The starter is buried way back in the engine.
Me: I don't care about that. Is it dangerous?
Doc Car: No.
Me: Am I ruining my engine?
Doc Car: No.
Me: Am I ruining anything?
Doc Car: Probably the starter.
Me: Am I gonna get stranded somewhere?
Doc Car: Well, you could get stranded at any time because of anything.
Me: (a milli-second of contemplation, then laugh): That's true.
Doc Car: I've got other cars that make the same noise, run just fine. Usually don't make the noise when it's warmer out. It's up to the owner.
Me: It doesn't bother me. So, I can leave it?
Doc Car: Up to you.Yeah.
Me: (thinking about how much I love my mechanic--he never tries to sell me anything..no pressure, no panic) As long as I'm not ruining my engine....
Doc Car: No, you're not ruining your engine.
Me: Okay, I'll leave it. I can always fix it later.
Doc Car: Sounds good.

As soon as I said this, I KNEW the wife was not going to be happy. After hanging up, I left the wife a voice mail and then I turned to my co-worker...

Me: (laughing) The wife is SO not going to be entertained about this. She is NOT going to be happy.
Co-Worker (also laughing) I'm guessing not.
Me: Would you get the car fixed?
Co-Worker: Get the car fixed.
Me: You're no fun. So, you'd replace the starter?
Co-Worker: Get the car fixed.

Just as soon as she said that, I got a text from the wife, directing me to call her. Oh dear. That didn't take long. I'll leave it to your imagination what she had to say about my decision to leave the screaming pterodactyl in place. Suffice it to say, she didn't agree with my decision and couldn't believe I didn't get the car fixed.

I got a well-deserved and much earned lecture. Can't say I enjoyed it but can't say it swayed me to change my mind. Again, it wasn't about right or wrong or money. It was because the noise doesn't bother me and because I'm not ruining my engine--what is the hurry? I offered the wife the opportunity to call the mechanic back and make an appointment to get the starter replaced. If it bothered her that badly, I'd get the starter replaced... but, she had to call. She declined to do so....

The baby pterodactyl gets to live another day!

I'm sure he won't be around for too long. Maybe spring break. Maybe summer. Maybe when I can't take the comments anymore. Until then, I'm gonna smile every time he screams. I'm gonna pinch his little butt....

....I'm gonna drive it to the nearest Mexican restaurant. I'll take the wife alone, not with a group. I may be dumb but I'm not stupid.

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