Oh Be No Mo Woe

Well, Addiverse, it has come down to this: this morning, I opened my very last box of o.b. ultra tampons.

Not the super plus. Not the super. We're talking the purple-box ULTRA o.b. tampons.

Those of you who have been in the flow of this blog (if you know what I mean) know that this is a VERY serious issue, equal to global warming and war in the middle east.

I had hoped that Mother Nature would "beat" the end of my o.b. ultra tampon supply, but she must have been out golfing with Al Gore or something because those eggs are shooting out to the exact day every dang month.

The wife said, "Aren't you too old for this?

No one tells you in fifth grade that 40 years later you'll be looking for tampons the size of paper towel rolls.

As it does not appear the end of my "friend" (and I do use that term lightly) is in sight, I woke up this morning with one mission in mind......

......find the purple box and start spending money.

I first went to Bay of Eeeee and found that yes, there were purple-boxed o.b.s listed. I was confused as they were cheaper than they used to be.  (Heck, I sold a box for $41.00 way back when they first discontinued them, not because I wanted to, but because I wanted to see how much they'd sell for. Boy, I wish I had that box back right now.) This made no sense--how can something that should be rarer become cheaper? I then went to the Amazonian Jungle and found that they, too had the tampons, albeit a little more expensive than the Bay of Eeeee. This still didn't make sense. There was only one thing to do....

.....go to the o.b. website.

It was there I learned that the purple-box o.b. ultra is BACK IN PRODUCTION!!!!!

I was giddy! I think Freckles (who is deaf and fell down the stairs yesterday and isn't even sure she is still on the planet) heard me exclaim my delight. This meant that I was saved from certain doom!

A web search suggested that these little bullets of love are now on the shelves at places like Wally World, GreenWalls and SeeVeeEss.  (I refuse to give free advertising whenever possible.) Wally World didn't have much of anything to choose from on their site, so I jumped over to GreenWalls....and, there they were....

ON SALE!!!

Oh dear god, I must go out and buy a lottery ticket today because THIS IS MY LUCKIEST DAY EVER!

I ordered six boxes.

I wanted to order more but that seemed a bit much. (I want to encourage my body to stop production by the end of the sixth box. One can hope.) Hell, I wanted to order a dozen boxes but I got a grip and went with a half dozen.

And so, it is a beautiful day in the Addiverse. I don't think you can understand how awesome this is unless you are one of those people who requires the paper-towel-roll-sized tampon. To find them on sale after being out of production makes it that much wonderful. I can open my last box with confidence, knowing that there is more to be had in the world....

....I am going to "like" the o.b. page on Book de la Face. If that doesn't scream "celebration," I don't know what does. Merry Christmas to ME!
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