Sun Singing and Officiating

Well, the Sun Singer's Celebration of Life has come and gone and all I can say is.....

"Wow."

Talk about an amazing tribute, a true testament to the man and his family.  The place was packed--and, that's saying a lot, considering the event was held at an exhibition hall, not a funeral home. People stood in line for an hour, just to have a thirty second chance to wish condolences to the family. Since the line was so long, many people had to wait until after the service to finish standing in line. The sheer volume of people was overwhelming.

Was this a man of power & prestige? Of  government or public office? Of fame and fortune?

No.  

This was a humble, generous, gentle, hard-working quiet man who worked in a blue-collar type position who was truly loved & respected by many.  That respect and love filled the room til it almost burst. You could feel it.  It oozed from the people their to pay their respects, it flowed from the people willing to stand up and share their stories, it filled the air like a warm, summer's evening breeze.  (That sounds so cliche, but it's true.  The place was warmed with palpable love.)

A day later, I am still shaking my head in wonder.

Since the Addiverse is all about me, I shall now shift the Sun Singer's celebration to me.  After all, I was the Reverend presiding over the service.

Seriously.  The wife and I walk in to the venue, weasel our way in front of everyone so we can sign the guest book and go help and that's when I see it.....

The placard says "Officiating: Reverend [Addi Warrior Princess]." 
(No, it didn't really say AWP--it said my real name.  We have no time for real names in the Addiverse.)

AND, all the little memorial cards they hand out as you enter the area have my name in them, with the word "Reverend" in front of my name.  All the wife and I could do is look at each other.  I couldn't believe it.  She couldn't believe it.  And, I must say, most of our friends couldn't believe it. Since these were people there that I knew from the late 1980's-the 1990s (and hadn't seen since then), they were pretty shocked by this new development.

No offense, but seeing my name with the word Reverend in front of it is REALLY funny!  I am sure the Sun Singer got a big, big kick out of that.

One guy remained incredulous.  We had worked together in the late 1980's (along with the Sun Singer) and so he had a very different view of me that would not very understandably include the descriptor "reverend." I explained numerous times that it was just a title gleaned from an on-line source, secured so I could marry or civil-union-ize those who couldn't find a church in which to do it such things, but he didn't get it.  He thought I was actually a full-time, seminary-going minister, even after I assured him repeatedly that I was not.

"What denomination did you get ordained?" he asked.

"None, really.  It's not like that."

"What seminary did you go to?"

"I didn't.  It's an on-line thing. You sign up and wa-la--you're a minister. " I thought this would finally clear things up.

"On line seminary school?"  He looked more confused than when we started.  "You mean, like classes and seminars on line?"

"No.  I didn't have to go to school.  I just had to fill out the application."  I tried to explain that this is a free lance gig, secured so I could help people get married or have celebrations such as this.

"But, you're a minister?"

"Well, technically," I answered.

I am sorry to say that I never did ease his confusion.  It dawned on me later that he was a very devout, born-again Christian with a very traditional, fundamental stance.  No wonder he was confused.

I actually had to do a few official-type things, working with the thankfully-funny funeral director.  At one point, she turns to me and says, "You're going to have to make an announcement and tell the people to speed it up. They are going to have to say less."

I must have looked like a deer in the head lights.  She pointed to the microphone and indicated that I was going to have to tell people that they should keep their condolences short and sweet so everyone would get a chance to get through the line.  She suggested I assure those that didn't get through the line that they would have the opportunity to do so after the service.

"I have to say that?"

"Yes," she assured me.

"Can't I just go through the line and tell people?"

"No, you need to do it from the microphone so everyone can hear you."

I gulped.  I looked toward the door and saw that the line went out the exit.  She was right.  These people would never make it to the front of the line, to the family, before the actual service was scheduled to start.
Nobody told me the officiant would get sucky duties like this.

"I have to write this down," I tell her.  "What exactly do you want me to say?"

And, so I wrote it down and approached the mike and said what I had to say.  Incredulously to me, everyone seemed to take it just fine; in fact, some people got out of line and sat down, obviously okay in waiting until after the service.  I had several people tell me what a wonderful announcement that was and that it was appreciated.  Others thanked me for relieving their fear that they wouldn't get a chance to give their condolences and so they were happy to learn they would still have the chance.

Score one for the funeral director.

There were some unexpected bonuses from the gig.  I had several people ask about getting married or civilized, others asking if I had business cards (I do not), one guy "reserve" me for his wedding ("probably in ten or fifteen years").  Even the funeral director asked for a business card, indicating they are always looking for people to officiate funerals.

Guess I should get some business cards.

The wife, always the more stoic and practical one, one-upped the business cards: "You need to set up a fee for service scale." She turned to some friends and told them I don't charge for my services.  "You need to charge for your services."

I suppose she is right.  If this is going to turn into a real side gig, I'm gonna hafta have a plan.  I had not intended this to ever happen, but here I am with people looking for a different way to do things, and I seem to be that different way.

The Universe works in very mysterious ways.

If you want me to officiate your ceremony or celebration, you better call soon.  My calendar is getting mighty full.  Call now and you can still get in the "free" category.  Just don't tell the wife.

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Godspeed, Sun Singer.  With much love to your wife and daughter.
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