Click here for Michelle Obama's Speech 8.25.08

Pinch here to pinch my butt. Ha ha!

FYI all Obama Fans: Do not worry. I won't vote for him, so in turn he will win the election. I promise to do my patriotic part for this country by not voting for him. Loyal blog readers know that I have only voted for losers, right down to the recent "I Voted for Hillary and she lost" vote. I will not stand in the way of change.

For non Obama fans: He is NOT Muslim, so STOP IT!


Dear Jillian,

You BITCH!

I am sending you the bill for the pants that no longer fit. Why don't they fit, you ask? Because I've been faithfully doing your workouts, that's why. While I may be able to kick anyone's ass, I'll have to do it in a new pair of pants.

Jillian, I have to break up with you.

I put a pair of jeans on last night and found myself thinking, "what is up with this--these pants don't fit! I look ridiculous." I go find the wife and show her how I look in the pants. Thankfully, she is brave enough not to lie and admits the pants do not look good. I thank her for this. Jillian, she spoke the truth. You? You let me do all those lunges and squats, laughing all the way to the bank.

I am leaving you and going back to Leslie Sansone.

Back off, Bitch.
Love, Addi




P.S.

Dear Madonna,

Please eat a sandwich.

Love, Addi


This photo is from judiciary.com. I thank them for not acting judiciously toward me for using this photo. How could I not use this photo? Obviously, Madge is doing some other form of exercise than I am doing. Yikes!

If this is what happens when you turn 50, I am SO going to spend the next four years eating ice cream and watching Xena Re-runs.

Dita, I am worried about you. Eat a sandwich. Go to McDonald's and super size it. Have a biscuit. Just eat something. I know you are busy dancing in a world tour and that takes a lot of calories, but really! Start an I.V. if you must. Eat something sticky and sweet. Find a funnel cake and inject it. Just do something before it's too late.....

.....remember, I am Jillian-fied and I can kick your ass. Don't MAKE me come to Europe and force feed you a fried Twinkie.....