Cheeseball Neighbor Gets Forked

Imagine our surprise when we woke up this morning to take the grrrlz (aka the dogs) for their morning walk & daily constitution....
when we see that Cheeseball neighbor has been toilet-papered, forked, shaving- creamed, gnomed and Shamu-ed.

I don't know about you, but I've never seen anyone get Shamu-ed before.

If you look closely in the photos, you can see the forks sticking out of the lawn. Genius!The fork thing is kind of funny and sure beats getting a lawn-full of cheese balls--well, until you try to remove the forks. It sounds easy but it is not. I'm sure Cheeseball Neighbor will soon be able to confirm this.

As we walk, we see that toilet paper has traveled the neighborhood--it was windy last night and those squares of wipe-yourself-dry are blowing down the road without much effort. This makes us laugh, as it's rather like when we would walk the dogs and find cheeseballs along the way.


As you can imagine, the wife is VERY glad the toilet paper didn't find its way to our trees.

The wife and I are unaware of what the occasion might be--it's not Cheeseball Neighbor's birthday, it's not a national holiday, there was no wild party (that we know of--we did hear voices outside in the middle of the night but didn't think much about it and it certainly was not to the decibel of a good party), she hasn't gotten married or divorced, she didn't have a baby (although I did dream she got a puppy--does that count?), she didn't win the Pulitzer.....perhaps her softball season is over and her players decided to "bless" her with a toilet-paper thank you. Maybe it was just a boring Saturday night. Maybe it was a drunken, boring Saturday night. Maybe someone just had some leftover forks from an afternoon cookout and decided, "Hey! We should Fork Cheeseball Neighbor!"

As for the gnome, everyone needs a gnome, don't you think? They even left the box--perhaps in case she wants to return it or to give the gnome a home during those cold winter months. I know the wife wants a gnome for her yard (ha ha). I bet Ms. Keith Bischon, Master Gardener, would fight for a gnome.

Looking at the shaving cream, it appears the artists tried to depict some form of an object but at this point, we are unable to determine what the actual shaving-cream-art represents. It's kind of like an ink test--"What do you seen in the shaving cream?" Take a look (on the door, to the left of the gnome) and tell us what you "see." (Don't worry--although I'm an art therapist, I promise not to diagnose you in regards to your answer.) Perhaps your answer will be, "Looks like a drunken fool had a can of shaving cream."

My advice to Cheeseball neighbor: Make the gnome a "traveling gnome." It's kind of like "tag" for adults. The gnome has to travel from friend to friend, but it must be placed surreptitiously in the night. (Well, as long as it doesn't come visit us.) It's a lot easier (and more earth-friendly) than toilet-papering and it's good for a good gnome giggle...although it IS a lot less entertaining than cheese-balling your favorite friend's car/lawn/neighborhood....let's call it the GNOME ROAM.....