Halloween was especially delightful this year. It's my favorite holiday (if you can call it a holiday--we don't get the day off and there's no holiday pay, so it's not really a holiday) and I have always enjoyed everything about it....what's not to love about chocolate and costumes? As we have a Halloween party at work every year (during work hours, designed for the clients), I always try to base my costume on something that the clients will like and to which they will relate. I've been Spongebob Squarepants (one of their all time favorites), Snape, Steve Irwin (before he died, thankfully), one of the evil step-sisters, Mr. Hankie the Christmas Poo...heck, I've even dressed as one of my coworkers one year (and she dressed as me). This year, I decided to go as a professional wrestler, as if there is one thing the clients seem to love, it's wrestling. No matter how fake, no matter how over-the-top, no matter how ridiculous, they love it. I have a love-hate relationship with this "sport." I have no interest in it, I don't watch it on TV, I've never quite understood the draw....but, we've gone to two live professional wrestling matches this year (the clients and me--not the wife-the wife does not find wrestling humorous or of any interest) and I have to say, it is ALWAYS a good time to go to a wrestling match. It's kind of like a Madonna concert--it's not a concert, it's an EVENT. That's how wrestling is--it's not a match, it's an EVENT. The whole thing is actually very hilarious, especially the part where people actually believe this stuff is real. Now, I mean no disrespect to the wrestlers, as they do end up beating the crap out of each other even while faking the fight, but really--it's so fake, you can see it from the upper sections of the biggest stadium. It is the crowd that makes the trip to a wrestling match worth it. I won't say anything more about the crowd, but trust me when I say it's colorful and the best part of the show. (I started to write about the attendees but couldn't find a way to say it without sounding incredibly judgmental, so I stop here--hell, I'm sitting there with them having a good time, so I have little room to talk.)
It's like a soap opera for macho men in tiny tights.
I decided to dress as my favorite (and I do use that term loosely) wrestler, CM Punk. I figure he's current, he's from Chicago, he has lots of awesome tattoos, he's the reigning champ (even though everyone says he's a cheater), he's easily recognizable by wrestling fans, he was featured in a recent article in my favorite tattoo magazine (does it scare you that I have a favorite tattoo magazine?) and he's a punk rock kind of guy. What's not to love about that? The only thing I had to buy was the championship wrestling belt, which I found at Wally World. (Little did I know it was the "wrong" belt, which was explained to me by many a fan--sigh. I had no idea. It was the only belt Wally World had and I thought it looked awesome so I went with it.) I donned my tattoo sleeves and snow-shoe gaiters, put my "only wear once a blue moon" contact lenses and slapped on some make-up to make a beard. Wa-la! Punk!
The wife kept calling me CJ instead of CM. Shame on her.
Let's see if you can tell which is the REAL CM Punk....
Not bad for a 50 year old woman using items in the house to create a costume, eh? CM Punk should be flattered.
....or not. He probably will need therapy if he ever sees this.
Maybe he should be tickled pink that I actually own his t-shirt. The wife can't even believe I wear it, let alone own it.
Anyways, it was great fun and I do believe my costume was a big hit. It was even more fun than usual because people didn't immediately recognize me....which I couldn't believe. I thought it looked like me with a bad beard, but people would stare at me with no recognition. It was only when I spoke that their eyes would light up and they would then laugh. And, laugh they did. I laughed right along with them. How can you not laugh when you are dressed up like a professional wrestler?
Had it been an "adult" party with friends, I would have worn little black undies in the true tradition of wrestling outfits, but since this was a work endeavor during daytime hours and since I hadn't shaved any of the parts that most definitely would have needed shaving, I stayed with black shorts.
Not as much fun but appropriate for the setting and took a lot less grooming time.
Triple crown winner, baby. That's me and my punk. As his website says, "WWE Champion! Loveable jerk. Often confused with Batman. Once tipped a stripper with a Filet-o-Fish."
Like I said...what's not to love?
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